Alaa Jaber is a self employed businessman based in St. Louis, Missouri. He grew up in New Jersey with five siblings and studied at Hudson County Community College before building a career on his own terms. In this interview, he talks about the people and habits outside the office that still shape how he runs his work today.
You Grew up With Five Siblings. Did That Change How You Work Now?
It did, more than I expected it to. In a house that full, you learn to share space and attention without making a thing of it. Nobody was the only priority at any given moment, so you figure out early how to wait your turn and how to speak up when it matters. Running my own work now, that habit shows up constantly. Clients, projects, and problems all want attention at once. I learned that skill at a dinner table in New Jersey long before I had a business to apply it to.
What Was It Like Studying at Hudson County Community College?
It was practical. I was not chasing prestige, I was building toward something useful. Community college gets dismissed sometimes, but it taught me how to show up consistently and get through coursework without anyone managing my schedule for me. That is close to what self employment actually asks of you. Nobody is standing over you making sure the work gets done. You either built that discipline somewhere before, or you build it fast once you are on your own.
How Did Moving From New Jersey to St. Louis Change Things for You?
New Jersey is where I started, but St. Louis is where I built. A new city strips away whatever reputation or shortcuts you had somewhere else. Nobody here knew me before I showed up, which meant everything I had was earned fresh, in this market, with these people. That is a harder way to start, but it is also a cleaner one. I did not have old relationships to lean on, so I had to be good at the actual work right away.
You List Football, Baseball, and Basketball as Interests. What Do They Give You That Work Does Not?
Mostly a break from being the one in charge. When you are self employed, you make every call, big and small, all day. Watching a game, I am not deciding anything. I am just reacting to what happens in front of me like everyone else in the room. That matters more than people think. If every hour of your day is a decision you own, you need somewhere that is not that. Sports are where I get to just watch.
Did Having so Many Siblings Teach You Anything About Managing People?
It taught me that fairness and sameness are not the same thing. With five siblings, you quickly learn that treating everyone exactly alike is not actually treating them fairly, because people need different things at different times. I carry that into how I deal with clients and the people I work with now. Some need more explanation, some need less. Giving everyone the identical approach is not fairness, it is just convenience dressed up as fairness.
What Do You Think People Misunderstand About Where You Come From?
That it explains less than they assume. I grew up in New Jersey, I have five siblings, I went to a community college in Hudson County. None of that is a story about inevitability. Plenty of people share pieces of that background and end up somewhere completely different. What I took from it was specific to me: the patience from sharing space with siblings, the discipline from getting through school on my own schedule. Someone else in the same house might have taken something else entirely.
Is There a Habit From Home That You Still Use in Your Work Today?
Checking in without being asked. In a big family, you notice pretty fast when something is off with someone, and you say something before they bring it to you. I still do that with my own work. I do not wait for a client or a situation to flag itself as a problem. I check on things before they need checking on. That is not a system I built for business. It is just how I was raised to pay attention.
What Would You Tell Someone Starting Out Somewhere New, the Way You Did in St. Louis?
Expect the first stretch to feel slower than it should. You are not just doing the work, you are also building the reputation that makes the work easier later. I did not get to borrow trust from anywhere else when I got to St. Louis. I had to build it one interaction at a time. That is uncomfortable if you are used to people already knowing you, but it is also honest. By the time people trust you in a new place, you know it is because of something you actually did there.